I Just Can’t Take It!

The past few days have been very bad. It all started when I heard Dad say, “Uh oh” and then told me to look outside by the hot tub. What I saw was not a happy sight. In fact, it was disastrous. Sunning himself by the steps of the tub was a 3-4 foot black snake. You all know how I feel about these creatures. (Third Grade Stunk)

This was the second time I saw a snake this large so close to the house. The last occurrence was when Kelly and Mark were living with us, and we had an ill black snake leaning against the garage door. Dad and Mark checked him out before we all went to bed, and the next morning, he had not left. Daddy called someone from the golf course, who examined him and announced he was ill, which was why he would not leave. So the brave man from the golf course picked him up with a pole and flung him onto the course (I worried about it sailing through the air and hitting an early morning jogger, but my hero was not concerned.) And that was the end  of snakes at our house until this new siting.

I named the hot tub snake Victor the Viper. We watched him and decided he had taken up residence underneath the tub. Someone suggested that we sprinkle moth balls in the area of Victor’s home, and that seemed to chase him off for a while.  We could not eat dinner outside that evening because it smelled of moth balls and gardenias, which is not a pleasant combination.

Unfortunately, Victor was back yesterday, so I informed Dad that I was relinquishing the job of putting the chemicals in the tub to him. No way Jose would I go near Vic until we got a snake remover to relocate him.

Though I was assured that black snakes are harmless and afraid of people (the feeling is mutual), they can still cause death by heart attack to me. I informed Bryce that there would be no hiding in the bushes near the hot tub any more.

So to relax, Dad and I went to play nine holes of golf on Thursday morning. When we arrived at the 17th tee, I screamed. Victor’s little brother or sister was lounging near the cart path. I took my tee shot, and quickly hopped in the golf cart. En route to the green, I glanced to the right, and there, slithering off into the woods, was another black snake. With a pounding heart, I told Dad I was not hitting any more balls on Hole #17.

I had a great tee shot on #18, and a surprisingly good second shot. However, my thoughts were still with the Viper Family, so when my third shot landed in the sand, I was done.

I returned home and peeked out my bedroom window to see if Victor was back. So far, so good. But I am a realist. We have not seen the last of him. Oy vey!!